Last week started with a call from a panicked funeral director.

He’d worked hard convincing a client that his services were the best in town.  He’d used his hearse for the removal, made sure he and his staff were impeccably dressed, triple-checked his facility before they arrived for the arrangement conference, had coffee, soda, water and snacks available for the family and much more.

He carefully walked them through the funeral arrangements.  He told them that typical burial services, with a casket, ranged from $5,000 to 8,000, depending upon the casket and services selected. 

He was delighted when they chose a stainless steel casket.  He was even more excited that they liked the most expensive register book package he offers.  They chose two nights of viewing and settled on three limousines.

This was going to be the most profitable service of the month for his small funeral home.

Until he handed the family the contract, that is.  That’s when they got saw their “ideal service” would cost over $12,000.

The funeral director spent a few tense minutes going over the bill, highlighting the price of each item and service.

In the end, the family chose to remove many of the extra services.  They downgraded to an 18-gauge casket.  Mr. Frugal, the son who had deferred to his mother’s decisions during the initial conference, suggested that they drive themselves to the service, so the limousines fell off the bill.

The final bill:  $6,598.

“What went wrong?”  He asked me.

First, by selling himself and the great services of his funeral home, he created a level of trust with his client family.  Then he told them that most funerals cost between $5,000 and $8,000, a fact which they trusted.

Then he sprung a $12,000 bill on them.  “WHOA!” they thought, “We trusted you and you lied!”

Of course he didn’t lie, but he created an expectation that the service he helped them plan would fit inside the quote he offered.

Not to suggest you follow this lead, but consider, for a moment, the process that car salesman use when negotiating a sale:  the monthly payment game.

Rather than discuss a final price for the vehicle, the salesman might ask “how much are you willing to pay a month?”  This confuses the buyer, but also gives the salesman a baseline from which to start.  Then, he goes to “talk to the sales manager to see what can be done.”

No salesperson I’ve ever met brings back a lower amount.  In most cases, the offer is much higher than the amount you thought was your ceiling.

But now he’s got a comparison.  So he can suggest a higher amount from you, which his sales manager will, of course, reluctantly accept after 20 minutes of discussion, because, as the salesperson claims, they “want to see you in that car.”

 (Photo Courtesy of Ernie’s Auto Sales of North Adams, MA) 

Why, then, do so many people drive out in a new car, excited by a monthly payment that was 20% more than they were originally willing to pay?

Because the salesperson created an expectation.  He told them that the payment might be as much as twice what they were willing to pay, but immediately followed with a promise to find a lower alternative.  Conveniently, that lower alternative was still higher than the customer’s original goal.

In the end, I suggested to the funeral director he start overestimating and making sure the final bill always comes in below the high-end.

Why?  Because any quote creates expectations for his clients.  By bringing back a lower total, he maintains the trust he’s built and looks like someone who can be trusted.

And, as I pointed out to him, some families do choose $12,000 funerals, like his clients did initially.  So he should AT LEAST quote $12,000 as a high figure.