I won’t go into crazy detail, because that’s available on stock sites like AOL Money & Finance, on news sites like KBDC and The Houston Chronicle.

But if you don’t want to read the full story, here’s the recap:  SCI offered to buy Stewart at a price of $9.50 a share.  One site estimated it at $1.3 billion for the whole company.

Stewart’s board of directors said “thanks, but no.”

I saw analysis from one Wall Street-type who claimed that a merger would benefit both companies because they’d save money on duplicated services.

That’s a fancy way of saying “If they merge, they’ll fire some middle managers.”

I think that the majority of funeral directors would see precious little difference.  Independent funeral directors, who make up 90% of the industry, will continue to serve their families the same way.

And it’s been my experience that even funeral homes from different corporations are similar in their operations.  In fact, the SCI and Stewart locations in my neck of the woods spent a few years swapping staff in a weird choreography of incentive packages and firings.

Regardless of whether SCI is successful in their bid, funeral service won’t change immensely.

But those funeral directors I know who currently work for Stewart and swore they’d never work for (or go back to) SCI will certainly feel the pinch if the merger goes through.

On a personal note, for the past several years, my experiences with both SCI and Stewart have left me with the impression that the local Stewart folks seem to know what they’re doing, while my friends at SCI are having a more difficult time.

Whether that feeling comes from amazing management at Stewart, poor management at SCI or something completely unrelated, I can’t tell.

On the plus side, Stewart’s stock got a nice bump from the news, before settling back down.

There is a growing push in the funeral industry to create websites for firms, no matter their size.

And while this trend is being fueled by website companies large and small (including our current sponsors, Hilltop.net) there are a few things you need to remember when starting or re-designing a website:

Remember who will use it.  A website is not a vanity site to make you feel better about yourself.  Potential clients and their friends will be using it.

Put the most important information on the front page.  Don’t “bury” the important stuff in three layers of webdesign.  People don’t want to search and, if they can’t find the info, they’ll go somewhere else.

Provide answers to frequent questions.  The best part of a website is that it can stop some of the repetitive phone calls asking about your location, your office hours, how to get a death certificate.

Keep the person being memorialized in mind.  Your website is not, actually, about you; it’s about the person who has passed away.  Make sure you “Obituary” link is easily recognizable.  And make sure you list current services with dates and times on the front page or just one page away.  I’m guessing that 50% or more of your visitors are there to find out when “Aunt Jane’s” funeral will be held.

Sell flowers.  Since many of your visitors are there for a specific service, make sure you have a link to your local florist or one of the big delivery services that can pay you a commission.  Funeral homes like Anderson-McQueen and Baldwin-Fairchild have flowers for sale right on their front pages.

Put your contact information everywhere.  Some people will “Google” your name simply to find a phone number.  Make sure your phone number is on every page and is noticeable.

And while I’ve discussed these very issues with Spencer and Ryan from Hilltop, this article was not written with their immediate input.  Still, if you need a website, you could do worse than to visit our sponsor.

The blog, Thank You Note Wording, has some great tips for funeral thank you notes, such as:

Dear __________,

The picture you sent us of __________________ is wonderful. It reminds us of so many good times we have all shared. Thank you for sharing a part of her.

With love,

_______________

Why not write some examples for your own client families and give them out with each box of thank you notes you distribute?

It only takes a few minutes put these together (get your staff to suggest their own versions or work with a local hospice or grief support group) and will benefit your client families for years.

One warning:  make a master copy or keep the handout in a computer file so you can print or copy fresh, crisp versions each time you need more.  Handing out a grainy, distorted photocopy of a photocopy of a photocopy makes you look sloppy and unprofessional.

Having spent more than 10 years working in the industry, I know there are a number of tools every funeral director/funeral home owner should have at her disposal.

A basic toolkit, with screwdrivers, pliers and wrenches is a must.  You can buy these at various brick-and-mortar stores or online from places like Amazon, Walmart.com and Target.com.

I remember a time when having a screwdriver meant being able to place a 400-lb decedent in a casket without calling on the local fire department or buying an overhead lift.

How did the screwdriver help?  Well, we removed both of the casket lids and placed the dressing table next to the casket.  Three staff members (one on the back side to steer) used a transfer sheet and loaded the casket.

And don’t underestimate the need for a working tape measure.  It’s easier to order the right oversized casket if you’ve measured the deceased properly.

How do you send obituary pictures to your local newspaper?  With the price of gas headed toward $5 a gallon, driving the photo down to the newspaper office seems like a waste. 

Believe me, there are still some funeral directors who don’t own a flatbed scanner. 

The unit pictured here costs just $49.99 from Amazon and allows you to scan photos to your computer, where they can be emailed or added to memorial folders.

Even in the computer age, there are just some things you have to use a typewriter for.  But the worst part about using a typewriter is finding replacement ribbon cartridges. 

The typewriter pictured here is new, so supplies are available, but older machines need hard-to-find ribbons.  My favorite place to find them?  Ribbon Train, which specializes in early printers and typewriters.

Even funeral homes in dry climates get rain every once in a while.  Invariably, the downpour starts just as your biggest funeral is ready to leave for the cemetery.

And while you probably have plenty of umbrellas for your guests (tell me you have umbrellas!) your staff will need some protection from the precipitation.

For your employees, rainsuits make a better statement and are more functional than umbrellas.  A rainsuit says “We’re prepared for anything” and doesn’t give the impression that your staff is hogging an umbrella that one of your guests could be using.  A suit will also allow your staff to carry more flowers to the van, help guests without having to juggle and umbrella and direct traffic with both hands free.

The suits above are available on Amazon for as little as $34.95.

A portable battery pack/car charger can make the difference in being stranded at a church and getting to the cemetery on time.

This unit, from Duracell, boasts jumber cables, an AM/FM radio and three AC outlets to power 110v items, such as lights, boomboxes, computers and more.

Since you never know where you might need power, this rechargable unit (or one like it) is a great item to stash in the trunk of your lead car or limousine.

Available from Amazon for $99.99.

The only thing worse than a car that won’t start because of battery problems is one that won’t start because you’ve run out of gas.

This emergency fuel carrier is collapsible and costs just $8.95 from Genuine Hotrod.  Put one in every vehicle you own.

 

 

The Wired.com article starts this way:

Monster.com founder Jeff Taylor helped you find a job, and helped ease you into middle age. Now he wants to help you build the last web page you’ll ever need.

It goes on to describe Tributes.com, a new website that just launched, that lets users search a database of obits from over 70 years of newspapers.  The site also allows visitors to set up memorial pages and leave condolences.

In effect, they’re going after Legacy.com and other sites which offer similar services.

It’s got smart people and lots of money behind it, so why won’t it work?  Here’s the quote that got my attention:

“We are building a channel to the funeral industry to build our site with them, so we can be an aggregator for all the obituaries,” said John Heald, a funeral director who is working with Tributes.com.

Tributes plans to sell its service to funeral homes that will then package an online tribute with the other services offered to the bereaved. Obits will stay up indefinitely, while condolences may come down after five to 10 years.

Jeff Taylor is a smart guy, and the folks giving him advice have lots experience in the business, but they’ve all overlooked a HUGE problem:  funeral directors aren’t buying new products to add to the other services they already offer to consumers. 

If anything, funeral directors are looking to cut non-essential items so that the price of their basic service isn’t overly-distorted by rising fuel costs and other economic factors.

Before the 2007 NFDA Convention, I discussed this “just add it to the final bill” attitude in the post, Why Funeral Homes Don’t Give Away Free Stuff.

In that post, I explained that such a business model will fail.  Many other established industry companies are seeing how this works, including our friends at Respectance.com.  Here’s what they had to say in a recent blog post on their site:

Funeral home directors are using the internet to buy supplies, you read about it every day, you have national conferences that tell you how your clients are wired. So why don’t you get it? Why do we have to keep banging our heads against a wall just to get you to see, hear and feel? Customers are asking for it, we’re telling you people want it. Listen up!

Later in the post, our friend Richard Derks implores his readers:

It’s time for the funeral homes to put their client’s needs first. It is not only about greenbacks. We at Respectance are listening. We are offering our site and expertise to you FREE to pass it on as a value added service to your clients.

If a site like Respectance, which offers free service, can’t get funeral directors to pay attention, how is Tributes.com going to find takers for a pay service?

If you read the full article, you’ll notice that the company is starting with $4.3 million in capital.  How many other, more worthy ventures could have been started with that kinda cash?  Side note:  Respectance recently garnered another started with $1.5 million.  Reference:  VentureBeat.

And while there’s lots of money being thrown around in an attempt to be THE PLACE for online memorials, funeral directors aren’t even paying attention. 

No, my Magic 8 Ball isn’t very accurate, but I think that Tributes.com will have to transition to a free service and make their money with ad sales within 18 months.  Anyone wanna bet against me?

You can read the full Wired.com article here.

Here’s the email I just received, obstensibly from EPPICard:

Dear EPPICard member,

We recently reviewed your account, and suspect that your EPPICard account may
have been accessed from an unauthorized computer. This may be due to changes
in your IP address or location. Protecting the security of your account and
the EPPICard network is our primary concern. Therefor, we have temporarily
blocked your banking account.

To unlock your account call our toll free number: 570-338-0131

To protect your account please follow the instructions below:
   - NEVER SHARE YOUR PASSWORD with other persons
   - ALWAYS LOG OFF after using your online account
   - NEVER access EPPICard`s website by clicking on a link provided in an e-mail

We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause, and appreciate your
assistance in helping us maintaining the integrity of the entire EPPICard System.

Thank you,
EPPICard Security Advisor.

Copyright 2008 EPPICard - The safe and secure way to acces your payments.

First, the number is not, as claimed, toll-free.  Second, I don’t have an EPPICard.  Third, the email was sent to these addresses, which the fraudulent sender foolishly forgot to hide:

info@cosmeticdentalcare.com,
info@cosmofx.com,
info@cosn.org,
info@cossi.org,
info@costaricabackpackers.com,
info@cotcovers.com,
info@cottagerealty.org,
info@cottagesoap.com,
info@cotton.org,
info@cottonportfishncamp.com

This is just another example of frauders adjusting to their victims.  People have learned not to click on links in these kinds of emails.  They’ve learned that credit card companies won’t ask for account information through email.

So they provide a phone number.  The number might even be a pay number, one that charges major fees to your phone bill, simply because you dialed.  Or someone on the other end will answer and ask for your credit card number to access your account.

Not having an EPPICard, I know this must be a scam, so I ignore it.  But to someone who does have this card, the email reads like a real message that must have come from their company, because it reminds them to be safe with their card information and to call, rather than click.

My tip?  If you need to contact your credit card company because of an email, always use a phone number from the back of your card or from a recent statement.

I wrestled with a high-impact but lightweight and portable design for the booth we’ll take to upcoming trade shows, until I realized that each of the expos we’ll attend this year are drive-to events.

So I don’t have to worry about squeezing items into an overhead bin, or lowering my shipping costs.  Since I’ll be driving to each convention, I can carry as much with me as I can cram into a vehicle.

And while that doesn’t mean we’ll be crafting ironwork for our setup - it still needs to be easy to carry and setup - I’m not as concerned about breaking everything down to 24″ pieces.

When I first started sketching this new, unrestricted design, I produced some pretty wild drawings that I’m embarrassed to share here.

So I took a break and wrote down my actual requirements.  Here’s what our booth needed:

- Highlight on fabric choices
- Signage describing our three model choices (BASIC, DELUXE, ULTRA)
- Cot or cot-like device to demonstrate product
- Storage space for sample covers
- Hidden storage place for empty boxes, supplies, etc.
- Room to invite visitors into the booth

But I also need to figure out what’s worked before, so I went back to pictures of our last two booths and evaluated them to see if anything we’ve already done would work again.

This is the booth from the IFDF Convention last June:

The display for covers is okay, but the fabrics don’t work together and the framework is not “strong” enough, visually, to provide an appropriate backdrop.  Also, I should have covered their carpet here, as it’s a bit distracting.

Here’s the booth for the national convention:

Once again, the framework isn’t strong enough, visually.  But the pictures are a nice touch, if only they were bigger.  Still no description of the different models and the covers are draped on a table or piled on the floor.  And since I couldn’t take a cot with me (wouldn’t fit in the overhead compartment) I made a cot-shaped table out of PVC pipe.

The first booth really showcased the fabrics well and the second featured a nice big sign announcing the product and pictures which “demonstrated” the product.  The PVC “cot” is also a good design.

So I need signage that readily identifies the product.  If I combine the utilitarian storage needed for sample covers with a display of fabrics, I can eliminate one requirement.

What I need are signs and shelves.

And while I could build PVC shelves that can be broken down to very small units for easy shipping, I’ve got the luxury of driving to these next conventions.

I’m considering these shelves:

I need signs, so I’m getting some printed, in nice big letters with simple photos of our covers on cots. 

Here’s a preliminary design:

The two large white boxes at the front will be made from PVC and covered with fabric.  I can store empty boxes and other supplies under them.  They’ll be used to demonstrate the covers, so they’ll stand in for cots.  Or I’ll make one like this a bring an actual cot with me.  I haven’t decided yet.

The two purchased shelving units will be surrounded by signage to help explain the product.  The top signage will have the product name and some pictures.

But this design still has one major drawback:  there’s little room for a lot of guests.

So while it will work for the IFDF convention and the Kentucky convention, we’ll need more space for the NFDA in October.

To solve this, I contacted Julie Stanhope at NFDA to discuss option.  I was hoping to get a corner booth on the main aisle, but those have already sold out.  Luckily, Julie had a solution.

For just $300 more than a corner, I can get a penninsula booth, which gives us access on three sides.  It would look like this:

This would let us stand in the middle and gather folks around both demonstration tables.  Twice as many people, a better location and more chances to sell product.

Even better, the 2008 NFDA Convention will feature a new general session location.  To further integrate the Expo, the organizers have put the general session in the middle of the expo floor.  A large open space, with a stage in the middle, surrounded by chairs (called “Theatre-in-the-round”) will fill the center of the expo.  Our booth, which I’ve already reserved, is on the permiter of this general session area, the big gray area on the left in this drawing:

The large space in front of our booth is DORIC Products.  On the right side of the booth is a big aisle, with rows and rows of booths going off of it.

I’ll upload a finished 3D schematic of the entire convention floor later, but in the meantime, check out the interactive expo map provided by the NFDA.

I’ve also decided on a slightly different design for the booth, which I’ll share tomorrow.

The funeral procession in the photo above, interrupted by unfortunate driving skills of another motorist, was delayed 30 minutes while another hearse came to retrieve the deceased.

This story is featured on the WV Car Accident Law Blog, which brings up some interesting questions about legal responsibility, liability insurance and worker’s compensation.

The article doesn’t share whether the hearse driver was hurt and it’s obvious from the picture and the article that the sedan is at fault here, but imagine a case where blame is not so easily assigned.

If your driver is at fault in an accident like this, are you protected against a lawsuit brought by a grieving family?  Do you have the proper levels of worker’s compensation?  Does your vehicle insurance policy cover damages to a casket?

Important questions to figure out before a scene like the one pictured here plays out in your own life.

This post won’t help those of you who run a one-person funeral home, but the rest of you can benefit from finalizing your Christmas on-call list right now.

I’ve heard a lot of stories about Christmas responsibilities, but my favorite is how one corporate cluster of funeral homes (15 locations) puts one funeral director on call for all of Christmas day.  And they used to delegate it by whoever didn’t have kids!

As a childless person, I think it’s pretty rude to assume that I’d want to take on so much responsibility just so Fred and Martha can spend all day with their families.  And putting one person in charge of so many funeral homes can cause some serious issues.

Imagine, for a moment, that your loved one dies on Christmas morning.  Added to the regular stress and grief of a death is the knowledge that a presumably joyous day is now one of sorrow.  Then, imagine that you can’t get through to someone at the funeral home or are forced to wait for a return call because only one person is available to handle all the issues that are generated by so many locations.

I think it’s pretty clear that this plan is a recipe for bad customer service.

In fact, I think I’d make sure that every one of my directors is taking any urgent calls about their own firm.  This might mean more work for the answering service, but it also ensures that anyone who takes the time to make a phone call to the funeral home on Christmas Day is accommodated.

Let’s face it:  there are relatively few sickos or bored people who will call on Christmas Day.  Even folks who don’t celebrate the holiday will still realize that it’s a special day and that your staff won’t be around.  So it’s safe to say that most of the calls received on Christmas Day are going to be important.

If you do delegate some responsibility to other staff members to answer calls and dispatch removal crews, make sure that you stagger the hours of responsibility.  Your employees will do a better job of serving your clients if they know they only have to cover the phones until noon or that you’re going to take the calls all morning so they can spend uninterrupted time with their kids and family.

I could file this under “Daily Nags” but I’ve pretty much let that category go since I can’t seem to remember to nag you every single day!  Consider the nag-free ride you’ve been getting a gift from your friend, Tim.

Still, this one’s perfect for November, because the end of year is coming fast!

Most funeral homes operate on a January to December fiscal year.  If that’s you, the end of your accounting cycle is almost here and there are lots of little things you need to accomplish.

If you’ve got an outside accountant, she’s probably got a WHOLE LOT of other clients who will also need to finish up end-of-year work, so don’t wait until the last minute to go over your situation.

 Contacting your accountant before Thanksgiving will have two important benefits:

1.  He’ll be able to advise you of any last-minute purchases you should make or any tax-saving actions you can take before December 31st.

2.  He’ll see you as an attentive client, who will be easy to deal with and, therefore, he’ll won’t regret picking up your file.  It’s always important to make sure your accountant actually wants to work on your files.  Not only to ensure accuracy, but to make sure you get the most beneficial help.  (Just remember, everyone wants to enjoy their job.  Make sure you’re the “fun” client or at least the proficient one.)

I just met with my accountant last week and found out that several of the big equipment purchases I was planning for next March might make more sense this year.  In fact, she even suggested I take out a loan (if necessary) to finance some expansion, since the debt would help offset the record gains our cot cover business has realized this year.  (You do know that we make quilted cot covers that are wowing the funeral industry, don’t you?)

But the simplest reason is also the most practical:  calling your accountant early will ensure that you can get an appointment during a very busy time of year!